....

So amazingly I have figured out the meaning to life, the universe and everything.
Funnily enough Douglas Adams (The author of 'The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy) has it pretty spot on.
I mean 42 seems like a logical enough answer to a question that is undoubtedly one of the most commonly asked questions there ever was (of course there are other questions such as 'why doesn't *insert name here* love me? Or the ever classic one, 'is there really a god? What is the purpose of his divine being?)

Anyway the point of this whole post was to tell the world (or whoever reads this.... actually does any one read this?) that I Kate *rest of name hidden here* have figured out my own meaning of life.
Yes it does revolve around Douglas Adams (Bless him) and a variety of other seemingly meaningless objects, emotions and various moments.

First of all, here is MY opinion to the awesome question on life, the universe and everything--

1)Be happy with what you know, jeeze, if there really was a God and he (or she) wanted us to know the meaning of everything our purposes and shit then I'm pretty sure we would be like Marvin the manically depressed robot and have a brain the size of a small planet...
2) We would all be perfect that way... How stupid would that be?
Being perfect, which means we wouldn't be able to learn from our mistakes (although some people really do need it smashed into their skulls)

Anyway I totally lost track of my rave... Grr
Have a fabulous life,
To all the people reading this from the states Happy Thanksgiving
People from New Zealand, please light a candle for the 29 miners who lost their lives on Friday last week and pray for their families.

Love you all
Kate
xx

Life Lesson #1

N.B- I never knew I could be so philosophical

Don't be unhappy in what ever situation you find yourself in. Because then everything gets more complicated then it really needs to be. The whole point of life isn't to know what is going to happen or knowing what the meaning to everything is, its about just living in the moment and seeing life for the beautiful miracle it is, and no one ever stops to take a breath of fresh air and say "I am truly blessed to be here, alive and well, in this moment. I am blessed to have a roof over my head, people who love me and I can do whatever I set my mind to." We never say this, to ourselves or others, because we are all to busy trying to figure out why things are happening, and in the end, that is what causes us the most damage.


Cheers
Kate
xxx

Wow

And that is really all I have to say...
Well I lied, but right now I guess 'wow' is a pretty reasonable place to start.

I don't really know where I am going with this. But then again, I don't ever know where I am going with anything I do on here.

It all starts with a simple thought, or the reaction to something that has happened.
A thought triggers the reaction which then evolves into something bigger.
And what more is a thought than a simple little electroid running through your brain triggering thousands of protons and neutrons?
Okay I don't get with all the science stuff (clearly) but you know what I mean.
Its like watching a movie where the hero/heroine gets bitten by a spider or a bat and suddenly their DNA mutates and molds into something else, something a little more 'super.' You know how you watch the film and it shows you how the spider bite or whatever changes the DNA you see how it twists and connects differently, and how little ladders of DNA form into mega ladders or some shit.

What ever, point is this is yet another blog spurred on by something a little more advanced for my intellect.. I'm not saying that I am stupid. I'm just saying I don't know as much as I could... Or I'm no Einstein (clearly, have you seen the hair on that guy!?!)

And I'm raving I know, it's just that theres so many things I want to say, so many things to type, do, curse at and then smile over.

But heres something that happened to me today that really made me see something. And I am forewarning you, because I love you, that you may find this offensive.

Today I was going home on the train with a very good friend of mine, when she got off at her stop I started to think of all the things in the world that really ticked me off. Bad drivers, racism, pressure to be this thin, or that made up, breasts have to be a double D or nothing, dresses have to be a certain length and show this amount of skin, girls (and women) complaining about the pressure they feel they are under to be every males idea of a 'perfect woman', and boys (and mens) hidden fear of having their woman nag and push them into being her idea of a 'perfect man', peer pressure in teens, 'I have to drink this much' or 'I have to pretend that I have done this or that so my friends think I am cool' (what the hell is cool anyway?)
And last but not least (and this is by far my favorite one to hate)--
The fact that every single human being (myself, and you included) have this attitude where it is all about them.
It's an attitude where you think 'I am so much hotter then her' or 'I deserve that and she (or he) doesn't'
God I know I do it!
I try hard as hell not to, but there is no way I can stop it.
It's in OUR nature.
Humans are, and always will be scum.. Or at least 90% of us are anyway...

And you know what the other 10% is?
It's children and those people considered as 'special' or handicapped or what ever you want to call them.

I call them special, and I include children in that.
Why?
Because they can look upon the life they have been giving with innocence and wonder, they don't try to change it, or to force their way into it, to control it.
No for them it just..... Happens.

They look at the world with eyes unclouded by judgment, hate, or greed. And they cherish what they have.
At least when a child falls down they may cry for a moment, and then they dust themselves off and go play again.

I wish I was still at an age where the most important thing to me was stepping outside and staring up at the big blue sky in awe.

Nothing is more important then the lives of that 10%, because they can really teach us something.

And I truly with all of my heart believe in that.
And that is what makes them so special



Bless you,
Kate
xxx

Sometimes..

I know I've been spreading this positive idea around this page, and I am going to keep trying to do just that.
But what I came on to say today is, something a little less positive.

I wish--
Sometimes I wish that I could go back to the moment I realized I loved you.
Just to stop myself from getting so head over heels. I feel really let down, by you, and by everyone. You were my friend, my love.
The sunshine in my life. And then it changed.
You became someone else, and I, still in love with the person you were, thought I could change you.
It all seems so pointless now. Now that I know who you really are.
Maybe it was me?
Who am I really?
I would like to think that I know myself, know what I want, know how I feel.
But that is a lie. If there is anything I know, it is that I don't actually know myself.
Theres the person I am when I am with my friends.
The person I am with my family.
The person I am when I am alone.
There is always something that the three me's have in common.
But that is because they all seem so sure of themselves on the outside, when deep down, they are lost and insecure.
Insecurities that quadrupled when you tore my heart out and left me to die..

Deep within me I know that I will always love you, no matter what you did to me. But there is the part of me that knows I deserve better then what you had to offer.

It's sad that I lost your friendship. But maybe, just maybe I am better off without you..?

"No man who purposely hurts a woman deserves her love. No man who harms a child deserves life."


No matter what you have done to me, I still wish you a happy and long life.
I love you, from now until forever.
And that is all I have to say.

Confessions

I saw you, standing alone in the distance, you're eyes burning into the horizon.
Breath, cool and calm, watching the slow rise and fall of your chest.
I can hear you're heart beating, feel your blood run through my veins.
I fear to call for you, fear that my voice will be lost in the wind, a fear so deep that it's hard to admit to myself.
I'm with you, silence engulfs us. I want to tell you that you are the only one, I want to tell you that despite all the things that have happened I will forever love you.
I reach for you, wanting to wrap you in my arms.
I close my eyes as my hand reaches for you, and then...

Then you were gone.

Disaster, Glorious Disaster

There are tons of things that rush through my mind when I come on here. So many things to say. So many lessons to learn, questions unanswered.
For many of us (myself included) our days are governed by unanswered questions, lack of confidence, not only in ourselves but in others.

Its saddening to see how much hate there is in the world, nobody stops for a moment to look up to the sky, arms open wide and be truly, deeply moved with the knowledge that no matter what comes our way there is something out there that is bigger then us.

The problem with people these days is that no one knows how to communicate properly. The world is governed by technology, forced to believe that being skin and bones is beautiful. I hear the words 'ugly, fat, slut' everyday. The thing is that the only ugly thing about anything is peoples attitudes towards it.
I mean, come on people! I feel like a stuck record..

We all know that within us all, we have the same thing.

Life.

Tough as it may be, we still have it, and it is something that should be treasured greatly.
I want you all to imagine a world without life..
No plants, no birds, no humans, no fish.

I think if you can get that image in your head, then you will see the real meaning of the word 'ugly.'

Just think about it would ya?

x
Kate

Lack of posts... Or lack of anything interesting to say?

Okay obviously its clear I haven't been on here lately.
Its probably because I have been busy trying to get a life, you know, 'cant spend my life on the internet' and all that jazz.

So I've been thinking a lot lately (and my God it really is hard work, sometimes I think I can smell my brain frying) trying to sort out this whole positive attitude and what not.

I got into thinking what exactly makes people have a positive attitude, and how can I encorpertate that into my life?

Recently I have spent five minutes of my morning (and that is litterally all it takes to make someones day) to text my friends wishing them a totally amazing day.
From what I gather, it has really made an impact on their lives. I talk to them at the end of the day and all I get is 'Thanks to your texts in the morning I wake up positive and my days have been GREAT!'
It always leaves a warm fuzzy feeling in my tummy.

See I never really paid much attention to the whole positive thing, and for those who know me, they can vouch the fact that I am generally what appears to be a 'grumpy person.' I want to clear this up, I'm not a grumpy person, I am one of those people who can't shut off their mind until everything that needs to be done that day is done, and even then my mind runs wild. And, I've never really understood emotions, so I tend to steer clear of them. Hence, the permanent scowl on my face.
If you get to know me you'd propably wish you didnt, I'm a good friend, but my problem is when you get past my shy (or 'grumpy') exterior you cant get me to shut up.

Anyway, my point is--
One morning I woke up, feeling rather down and out, a close friend of mine was feeling much the same, and this idea popped into my head. I would do anything for this girl and hell, 5a.m in the morning she can call and I wont get mad. I wanted to cheer her up, forget my own problems, this was someone I cared about and HATED seeing so upset. So I text her, it was nothing fancy at all just a simple-
'Good morning sweets! I hope you have a fantastic day! Remember to keep smiling and tell people who try to bring you down *%&$ off! You are awesome! Love you! xxx'

See, nothing fancy. But it made her day, and I presume it put a smile on her dial.
So what I'm trying to say is each morning, when you get out of bed, no matter the time, date, weather. I want you to say to yourself

'Good morning! TOday is going to be an amazing day! I am a strong, beautiful, caring, intelligent person. My freinds are lucky to have me, and the people I meet today are lucky to have met me. I am going to take today with an iron fist and a smile on my face. Nothing can bring me down. I am the master of my life! No one can make me feel anything unless I give them permission to'

It doesn't have to be that exactly, but something along those lines. I want you to take control of YOUR life, I want you to be the one to make yourself happy.
Seriously try this, even if it is for just one week. You will wake up positive, and the day will be so much easier. I tried it, and seriously life is going great!
Because I have the attitude that says to everyone who wants to bring me down 'f**k you! I am awesome.' I don't let things get to me anymore!

Remember, you are the master of your destiny!!

Much love, happiness and peace.

Kate
xx